Connie's Corner

My thoughts on caring for a loved one in poor health.

First of all, I'm sorry I've missed a week (or more) of blogging. My Jim has been very sick and in the hospital (again). He is home now. His clotting level (from warfarin) got very, very high and he has been taken off of it permanently, a huge deal because he has had dvt's (deep vein thrombosis) and lung emboli in the past. He's been on warfarin for over six years. But he is home now and feeling a little better, but he may still have to go back for blood transfusions if his hematocrit does not improve in a couple of weeks. For those who understand, it's 7.9 on his last labs from the 22nd. Normal for men is almost 14.

Anyway, I have a little breathing room this morning to try and write some. When I was very young, being a caretender for a loved one was not even a thought that entered my mind. That was for "old" people and "other" people. I read now according to statistics more and more of us will be falling into the caretending catgory as our population ages so I feel it is an appropriate topic to address.

When Jim and I first met we were in excellent health, and those vows in the wedding ceremony were just words, pretty words, high-sounding words, but just words without real meaning. All I thought of was how wonderful life together would be. We had the usual worries, jobs, money, raising our children. Getting old was far, far away. All struggles were minor because we had high hopes for the future, and we were in love.

Time continued, people around me got old, and I got older. First, I lost my mom to lung cancer. Although we were close, we could have been closer. I could have done more, and I had regrets when she passed. I wished, later, I had quit my job and spent more time with her...but I didn't and the past cannot be changed.

So when Jim got sick, I knew what to do. On October 14th, we will have been married 49 years, and we are still in love. Our marriage vows have real, concrete meaning now. And that thing inside me, my immortal soul, tells me what to do.

Life is still good and as someone said, today is a gift and that's why it's called the present. We are still enjoying it and have hope for the future.

until next time....c