Who Do I Think I Am??

This one's about the bling and the ringtone.

What's up y'all? Happy December and stuff. Coming to you live and direct from the absolutely freezing basement (cuz that's where the beer lives) from under a blanket, when I should be getting ready to watch some football (cuz we still haven't acted on any impulses to upgrade the tv down here to one that can show sporting events). I just hate dragging my laptop all over the place. So damn lazy, I know . But you're not gonna do anything about it, and I will when I feel like it. You'll have my cold nose and my snarky words, and you'll like it.

And I'm gonna save the rest of my day for the lower portion of this entry.

CHRISTMAS MUSIC BREAK!

If you read my last entry, you know I have a thing against Christmas music. It's only because of two things (primarily): 1) I'm so over going overboard trying to celebrate Christmas. And that's due to working in retail, plus the fact that I don't celebrate it like I used to when I was younger. So it's not as fun for me, all the way around. I suffer from a deadly combo: Being a retail person means you get to watch other people shop for other other people (and that's not a typo...I did intentionally say "other other") when you could be wasting your eight hours at work shopping for people who aren't "other other people". The other side of that combo? The fact that I don't really celebrate anymore. Whether it's me just getting older, or just doing small things with Jess the CWC's fam, I'm cool with that. But long gone are my days of anticipating a pony for Christmas.

The highlight of the day though was watching an elderly woman trying to reach for something we decked above the regular merchandise. I came back off lunch, was talking to G-Stamm in photo about him taking his lunch, and I heard the sound of something falling and hitting the ground. I looked over, and a senior was trying to grab something she had no business grabbing (as it was so high). I offered to help, but she declined because she was "getting it on her own". Little did she realize that we had the same box of cookies even more readily available on an end that she walked past, and didn't need to struggle just to break more of the shitty cookies she was so intent on grabbing. TWITTER ALERT: #dontdothat

So I went to change my ringtone the other day to celebrate Christmas the only other way I know...by leaving my cell phone in the office at work and having it blast my favorite Christmas song when I'm not in there, but for everyone else to enjoy and/or silently (or perhaps, in my boss' case, very verbally) motherfuck me for not leaving my phone on something more palatable...like, say, vibrate, when it just sounds like you're shaking 6,000 roasted chestnuts against an unopen fire hydrant. Only, I forgot that I just purchased my last phone on New Years' Eve of the past year. So no Xmasy ringtone (lost them somewhere in the shuffle between carriers and Micro-SD cards). Luckily, I can upload songs from my iTunes library to https://www.myxer.com and just effin' make the shit up as I go. After a few minutes, BAM! New ringtone!

Now, everybody can do that. And I'm sure everybody who's at least 20 has heard this song before. WDC readers, I'll slam 50,000 GP's your way if you can guess which [approximately 23-second] bit of the song is my actual ringtone. And that's a real live threat if I've ever put one out there!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OR07r0ZMFb8&ob=av2e

Amazing how "special effects" worked in 1987.

VITAL STATS:

So, your boy over here today was named "Customer Service Employee Of The Month" at the local Wall. Semi-nice honor too, actually, cuz they actually give you things. "Pick-your-own" $10 gift card, a certificate honoring your well-doing, and a pin that's too heavy (actually) to pin on the top of your pocket. Plus, I get to eventually have a pic of me hung in a place that pretty much no one pays attention to in the office hallway. Normally, when the co. does things like this, it fades out after a month or two. The free soda and bag of chips isn't for everyone, so nobody cares. But if you're gonna dangle a $10 gift card of my choice and hang my picture up, dammit, tell me when you're gonna do this, so I can take a damn shower first! And let me tell management about all the people who feel so better about themselves and chuckle when I'm pretty much making fun of them, or the job I do, while I'm doing it. Jess the CWC had an interesting take on it...after congradulating me, she was like, "Nice job, Mr. Employee Of The Month Who Hates His Job!" To clarify, I don't hate my job; only certain aspects of it. And certain people. But I'll give a reprieve to the old ladies I fuck with that love my banter with them. They make me let me be who I've become...the "Customer Service Employee Of The Month".

And let's see how long this initiative lasts. #notgonnamakeitpasttheholidays @Walgreens (Twitter lingo for the uninformed)

And that pin has some weight to it. Not like the old "Service Star" pins, that a certain MGT wears to just keep the pocket together on his shirt. These pins actually sag the fronts of pockets. Maybe I should go back to wearing the company-issued polos we no longer issue. Then I can wear all of my flair the co. dishes out, and not feel saddled by the lanyard they are making us wear. Cuz if I hang anything else on it, I'm not gonna be able to lift my neck. For reals, playas.

Alright, I've had enough. I'm making my way toward higher ground in this house, possibly something to eat, and some football. Definitely an early night for this kid. Peace, love, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!