My Life

My most embarrassing moment.

OK, they tell me I must write this most embarrassing moment as a short story since I am embarrassing my friends so easily...so here goes...

As most everyone knows by now, I manage a convenient store/gas station. I am sure you all have a favorite stop that you go to regularly to get your coffee on your way to work, or to fill up your tank on the way home.

Well, I have been with my company for about 4 1/2 years now, I started at one of the smallest stores we own, moved up to a bit larger one about 1 1/2 years later, and am currently at one of our largest locations.

Now the big issue here is, my first store was smaller than 900 sq ft, second store was just over 900 sq ft, this store is big enough to place both of those stores into, and probably a little more!

The layout of the store is really kind of cool, its an awesome store. If you walk into the side door, there is the register area (a large step up platform with two registers, all the tobacco products, a sink, and all that good stuff), then the showroom floor, it is huge, and then there is a hallway with the men’s restroom on the left and the walk in cooler door on the right, and then the last door on the left is the ladies restroom and the last door on the right is my office door...The front half of the store has huge windows that go clear across the end of the building (where the side door is) and all the way across the front of the store (try to picture this, it is important to know towards the end of the story...I promise!)

Most stores only have one person on shift at a time, me being the manager, I only run the register a few hours a day. I spend the rest of the day doing my reports and then kind of running all over the store (inside and out), stocking, cleaning, wiping down pumps, picking up trash, cleaning up the stuff that gets blown out of the pick up trucks while they are using the car wash...

Side note here: If you have a pick up truck and you take it through a car wash and you have a bunch of litter in the bed of your truck...the stuff doesn’t magically disappear. I know it is hard to believe, but it actually gets blown out of the bed of the truck and ends up on the bay floor, then little elves (such as myself) pick it all up and put it in the proper containers. THANK YOU for storing this tid bit of information in the back of your mind, hopefully you will use it in the future. We elves want to thank you in advance for your consideration on this matter...

Anyway, this store is located off of the major highway that takes you from Oklahoma to Dallas and then on to Houston, we are the first exit after many miles of open fields and no rest areas...We get a workout here, always busy...time gets away from us easily and there is always something to do, or someone that needs our help...2 minutes without a customer is a very rare thing...so you have to do everything at a very fast pace!

Well, in doing so much running and staying so busy all the time, I started to lose weight, A LOT of weight actually. I thought, great, awesome, went to Wal-Mart, bought me some smaller work pants, ordered me more uniform shirts...this is great I thought...

OK...here we go...are you ready for this...its going to get really good, well, really bad actually, according to who’s perspective your going with.

I was running register one day until noon, no big deal, I love talking to people, helping those I can, giving directions, (trust me...I can get you just about anywhere in Texas) and I really enjoy this part of my job! But, by about 10:00am, (and after roughly 2 pots of coffee) I had to go to the bathroom...I mean I really had to go!

Well, there is always a line for the restrooms, and remember this is a large store, and remember the lay out of the store, and most importantly remember how you have to do everything really fast paced?

I had been waiting for my opportunity for about 45 minutes, finally the store is clear, and the people at the pumps are using credit cards...I run as fast as I can to the ladies room (clear at the other end of the store, remember?) I go as fast as I can, put myself back together, hear the bells ringing, (a customer wanting a pump turned on) run back to the front, the whole event took about 45 seconds...great right?

Can someone tell me why I didn’t think to buy new, uumm, undergarments when I went to buy the blasted work pants?

OK, I am up front turning pumps on when I feel quite uncomfortable about where my uumm, you know, are now hanging. I mean, let me put it this way, the seat of my pants was the only thing holding up my, well you know...

I am like, oh no, everyone that comes in can see, so I am up there tucking my shirt in properly, reaching to my knees (almost) for a waistband when I realize, I am doing this in front of this darned picture window...2 feet tall (is about what I felt), blush, is not even the appropriate term for what was happening to my face...Lord what did these people think I was doing? I could have died...

While they turned back towards their pumps and acted like they saw nothing, I slipped in front of the Copenhagen display, (about 4 feet tall and about that wide as well) finished pulling everything up, took care of the, unusually quite, customers that came in to pay for their gas, when I realize...I did all this on video...What did Fred say at that manager meeting about coming and pulling video whenever he wanted to? Oh Lord don’t let today be the day!!!! I would just die, or lose my job for hiding the video tapes from my boss...Which would be worse I ask you?

Luckily, Fred didn’t come and request video, and as soon as my cashier arrived, I slowly walked to my office (running was out of the question), pulled out my sewing kit and made some adjustments to uumm, one of my waistbands, then proceeded to do my reports. After completing my reports and going to the bank, I clocked out, and went shopping!

OK, there has to be a lesson here! Oh yea...

If you lose enough weight that you require smaller outer garments, don’t think for a nano second that you don’t need smaller under garments as well!

I now let the outer go a bit baggy, but keep the under new monthly.

This concludes short story number 3, is everyone happy now? I have completely humiliated myself...but that’s ok...see I am the writer, and let me remind you, I will be watching and listening to see what my next short story will be about. Be afraid, be very afraid...Luv Ya!!!!!! Bubi...