Monkeys

GRRRR

Okay. Well, if I wasn't totally confused on the situation with Nick before, I am now.

Last night, I had a long talk with Eric regarding Nick. I decided that I shouldn't see Nick anymore. Why? I had a great time, right? Well, I don't want to get hurt again. I have only ever seriously loved 3 people. Joe, Jay and Eric. In that order. Each of those relationships deteriorated so that the guys could be with someone else. Well, Nick is very good looking, and built. No other way to describe him as far as the physical aspect. He has a wonderful personality, very very kind. :) Now, that stuff adds heavily to insecurities. Big time. So anyways, Eric tells me that he can tell I like Nick. Yeah, I'm not even trying to hide it. :) But, so he encourages me to go out with Nick again.

Today, I go into work, and Nick is working the day shift. He usually works the night shift....
But anyways, we decided we might go out tonight. So, I am supposed to call him tonight. We shall see.

But, I am still worried about the whole "he might leave me for someone better." Now, understand this, I am not going into this with commitment on my mind. Commitment is always nice, but I am not looking for him to be my next husband. :) Not yet anyways...lol. But, Eric's mom told me "just go into this for fun. If more comes of it, it's a bonus for you." And she is right. So, how do i loose that insecurity????????????

bEcKiE!