Life in it's own way

Why?

Why do I always make things so difficult for myself? Not that there was anything I could have done to prevent this from happening, but still..
About a week ago I had a dream, no, it was about 2 weeks ago.. Anyway, the dream was about this guy, a guy I work with, a really sweet and cute guy, but that's beside the point (well actually it's not, but hey..) Anyway, I don't remember the entire dream, but I remember us ending up kissing.. That morning I woke up thinking, why the **** did I dream about him? And why this? But nothing else, I mean, I've always thought he's kinda cute, but that was it, or so I thought. A few days later when I was at work, I remember looking on the whiteboard where we write down who works that day, afternoon and night, so the patients can see that, and seeing that he (Jeroen) had to work that evening, and I remember that I was really happy I would see him in a few hours.. That made me wonder, what was going on here? A few days later, valentines day, we went out to dinner with a few people from work, and after that we would go to some bar. Jeroen had to work that evening, but I had heard that he would come to that bar after work. I just kept looking at the door when we were at that bar, waiting for him to come..
To make a long story a little bit shorter, i guess that dream made me realize I like him more than I thought.. Now that shouldn't be a problem right? I mean, what's wrong with that.
But I still can't seem to get Frank out of my head.. I saw him again yesterday, and nothing has changed in the way I feel about him..
I'm soooo confused!! Please tell me what to do!!
I'm really looking forward to tomorrow, when I'll be working with Jeroen again, but I can't seem to stop hoping I'll see Frank again tomorrow too..
Who have said love is a beautiful thing? It probably can be, I know it can, but why can't it be that way for me?

"I'll ride the trail till the stars turn pale
And camp at the break of dawn
Nobody will know which way I'll go
They'll only know I'm gone."