Sandy Supposes....

Broke Andre

Week 2 Prompt 1: I hereby resolve NOT to make any New Year's Resolutions at all.
Andre's Fractured Resolutions

         

         

         

         

         To make or not to make
New Year's resolutions?
That is the question that haunts
every self-aware or unself-aware individual!

Apparently Andre has made and broke "I hereby resolve NOT to make any New Year's Resolutions at all." He is, of course, not going to admit he either made or broke this resolution. That's alright! If you're going to make a resolution, that you know you're going to break ten days into the New Year, it may as well be one that's easy to break.

If Andre did break this resolution, what type of resolution would he make that he knows he would break. How about, "I will NOT drink any more banana beer or I will not eat any more bananas." That sounds like a resolution that a monkey, like Andre, would make and break on the same day.

                   

         I resoluted, or is that resolved to make a unique New Year's resolution last year. I remember the perfect one came to me after a crazy night of partying. I'd just climbed up into a hammock to sleep away the cob webs and I tumbled out. It wasn't my first crash to the floor. It wasn't even my first accident. For some inexplicable reason I seem to stumble, trip, or hip-check anything firm enough to leave bruises.

         Sometimes I swear doorways narrow somehow just as I decide to squeeze through. Tables and chairs try to tackle me and knock me off balance. Walls and their adjoining corners attack without warning, especially my tender toes.

         I vowed to be more careful. Everyone says it to me. I've heard it directed to me so many times, so perhaps I should listen to the advice.

         So, I tried to pay attention to my surroundings and be more aware. I thought bundling myself in bubble wrap and strapping a helmet to my head might be rather drastic. So, yep, I decided to be more mindful. It couldn't hurt, right?

         I trained myself to stop and scout. I really tried to plot safe, smooth passage around furniture. I gave walls a wide berth and I held my breath slipping through doors. I became vigilant.

         I don't know if I relaxed and let down my guard, but fifteen days after January first I slipped, and skidded into a most solid wall. During the whirlwind slide I flung an arm through a window and bounced my chin off the window sill.

         Despite the best intentions, I broke my New Year's resolution. Obviously, I was not careful...enough.